I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Bring me that man meat
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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