i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
