scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
