Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
