Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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