so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
