I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
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