this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
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