So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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