mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize