There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
