so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
