Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Randomize
