You just made me feel so damn special
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
