The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
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