My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
