I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize