Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
pop tarts are not kleenex
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
