rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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