We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Randomize
