Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
