I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize