Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
