I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize