You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
