found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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