No stitches, just platelets and will power
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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