would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
