if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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