She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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