There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
i think im in europe. pls send help
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
