Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
