We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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