i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
