Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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