First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
you would pick up someone in the library
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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