He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize