so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
