atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize
