like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Randomize