I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize