I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
