I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Randomize
