I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
