Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
