You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
