let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
why do cheetos always look like penises
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
It's rum buckets o'clock
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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