didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize