i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Congratulations! We have a period
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
