Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
